Sunday

Where Have I Been - Take 2.

Hello (blows dust of blog and tries to bring it back to life), if you read my blog regularly you'll know that I haven't updated it in a few weeks. Primarily, yes, this was to do with Christmas which I am still desperately mourning. I found one of my Christmas jumpers the other day and it nearly brought tears to my eyes (I say nearly, I'm not completely crazy!). We had a really lovely Christmas and there were 30 of us for Christmas lunch which was very loud and fun.

If you've read my blog before, especially this post, you will know that for the last few years I haven't been very well. It was all to do with my back and was very complicated and sad and boring but I was essentially ill for nearly three years. In May I had an operation to try and fix things and the amazing and unbelievable news is that the operation worked and I have been getting better ever since. I've started a new school which I love and I feel like I'm making progress. I always said to myself when I was ill that if I ever got better I would be the happiest person in the world, and while I am more happy than I can express, I didn't realise quite how hard the actual 'getting better' part was going to be. I had been locked away in a little bubble for 3 years and everything still feels very new and scary. Sometimes I'll have a week where I feel like everything's so great and then I'll get completely freaked out by taking the tube or my back will start hurting again and I'll feel like nothings changed. But things have changed! Which is why I feel like my blog needs to change as well.

I have always tried to keep my blog pretty un-personal and while I was sick this made sense. I didn't like 'sick me' and my blog was a sort of way of pretending none of it was happening. But now that I'm getting better I think I want to start sharing that more online. I'm still going to be doing a lot of stuff about knitting, Twit-Knit and baking (no matter how much better I get these are all still very important) but maybe also some more things about what I've been up to, things I'm doing to try and make me less scared of the world as well as some more reviews of books and movies. I might even start doing some videos although this does seem incredibly scary! I don't know if anyone even wants to hear this stuff but I think it might be worth a try.

I hope everyone is having a great January. I think people are still working on their Twit-Knit scarves so I'm going to wait a bit before properly finishing it but it's been very fun and exciting and I can't wait to put together all the pictures!

Have a lovely day and a lovely month and hopefully see you (through the internet) very soon!
Scarlett.

18 comments:

  1. This is a really brave post to write, Scarlett. Living with constant pain and fear for the future must have been close to unbearable, and I'm so happy that you're now feeling so much better. You write beautifully so I'm sure people will be happy to read whatever you want to share - that's the luxury of blogging, it's your own little space to say whatever you feel like! Happy New Year!

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    1. Thank you so much! i've been so scared about writing this but everyone has been so nice! I think it's just weird because I thought the recovery was going to be the easiest bit and it's turned out to be just as scary!

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  3. This is a really inspiring post. I have had some bad mental health problems so it is really nice for me to see people who aren't afraid to show who they really are on their blogs rather than just putting on an 'everything's fine all the time' face. I like that your difficulties don't define who you are, but that they are a part of you- in the same way as knitting and baking and all the other stuff. You're really talented and the fact that you have been able to do all of this whilst being ill shows how strong you are. I'll keep reading if you keep blogging :) x

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  4. Brave girl, well done enjoy your weekend!

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  5. It is so lovely to 1, have you back, 2, To hear that you are getting better and getting 'out there' again and 3, to hear you speak so honestly about yourself and being ill - I know it is not the easiest thing in the world to do. Using your blog to pretend everything is peachy is good in many ways (a sense of 'normality' etc) and this is something I do too, but I always feel I'm being dishonest somehow by purposefully not talking about certain things! I think it'll be a really good place to share what you have done to help you feel less scared - a confidence boost and what not! Keep on getting better, I hope that 2013 is a year when everything starts to really fall into place for you!

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  6. This is such an honest, inspiring post. I'm not sure how you got through the time when you were in such pain- it's completely mind-boggling, but it's just such stupendous news about the operation working. How absolutely wonderful. After nearly three years of being unable to get around very much why wouldn't it be tough to adjust to a whole new life again? I reckon it's important to go easy on yourself if you find it tricky.

    It's so exciting that you might be blogging about new and different things - we'll certainly be reading. All the best crafty, cakey, knitty, Happy New Year wishes to you Scarlett x

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  7. I'm sure I speak for all of your followers in saying we're glad you're getting better and we'd love to hear more about what you're up to!
    I try and live by the idea that if it doesn't scare you, it's probably not worth doing, so stay brave and carry on fighting the good fight! We'll all be cheering you along the way x

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  8. I just discovered your blog today and am in love! You are quite amazing. I look forward to hearing more about your journey.

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  9. The first mention that you were ill was so concerning--am so, so glad you are on the mend. Take it easy on yourself! All the best from west coast USA. <3

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  10. Wow, you're so incredibly brave. I'm so impressed that you have written about this in your blog. I completely empathise. We all have ups and downs and the fact you've shared your story means such a lot. Inspirational! I hope you are enjoying yourself now, eating much cake, knitting many cute things and giggling all the time! You deserve it. Thank you for your blog. You've inspired me to write my own. I'm so tempted to join your twit-knit!!! X

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  11. I am SO glad to hear that the operation has worked and that your health is improving. This is a new chapter in the book now, Scarlett, and it is totally understandable that things feel overwhelming as well as exhilarating. (Don't forget that this is also just the normal way to feel for most teenagers - and loads of adults!) I can't wait to hear what the future holds. I'd definitely noticed a burgeoning confidence in your blogging voice and I know we're going to watch you bloom more and more. I can't wait! Thanks for sharing.

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  12. Hello. Yay!! Of course I would love to see as much of you as possible. Especially the new and improved you! I always enjoy your art! You are a rock star!! P.s. Maybe Yoga could help. Hurray!!

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  13. I always love your post - and finding out more about you is always interesting :) We're all part of your little bubble and hope that you continue to get better :)

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  14. You are inspiring young lady Miss T.G! Keep writing .. keep teaching us! Embrace the scary bits and so happy to know that the pain is disappearing and you are getting happier and happier :)

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  15. I agree you are inspiring! I think your blog is so nice and now it'll be getting that extra personal touch.
    I'm excited for your bravery!

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  16. Found your blog just now thru silver pebble's. hello!

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  17. Just to say I love your blog! I am an 80 year old trapped in a 24 year old's body and it was such a revelation to find other people who like baking and knitting and generally being granny-ish :) I have just started my own blog so I identify with the scariness (and the scariness of life in general at times) :) long may your blog continue xx

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